|
  |
|
|
CAT LOVERS and KILLER CAT !!!
Calling all CAT LOVERS !!!! " It was our new kitty, who discovered the fascinating dangling objects she spied hanging between my ..... (OUCH)
* tell a friend Why is it that only the women laugh at this? :) Cat Lover or Not, this is hysterical! We've all had trouble with our animals, but I don't think anyone can top this one: (forwarding from e-mail from a friend)
"Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter how legitimate my excuse, I always get the feeling that my boss thinks I'm lying.
On one recent occasion, I had a valid reason but lied anyway, because the truth was just too darned humiliating. I simply mentioned that I had sustained a head injury, and I hoped I would feel up to coming in the next day. By then, I reasoned, I could think up a doozy to explain the bandage on the top of my head. The accident occurred mainly because I had given in to my wife's wishes to adopt a cute little kitty. Initially, the new acquisition was no problem. Then one morning, I was taking my shower after breakfast when I heard my wife, Deb, call out to me from the kitchen. 'Honey! The garbage disposal is dead again. Please come reset it.' 'You know where the button is,' I protested through the shower pitter-patter and steam. 'Reset it yourself !' 'But I'm scared!' she persisted. 'What if it starts going and sucks me in?' There was a meaningful pause and then, 'C'mon, it'll only take you a second.' So out I came, dripping wet and butt naked, hoping that my silent outraged nudity would make a statement about how I perceived her behaviour as extremely cowardly. Sighing loudly, I squatted down and stuck my head under the sink to find the button. It is the last action I remember performing. It struck without warning, and without any respect to my circumstances. No, it wasn't the hexed disposal, drawing me into its gnashing metal teeth. It was our new kitty, who discovered the fascinating dangling objects she spied hanging between my legs (OUCH). She had been poised around the corner and stalked me as I reached under the sink. And, at the precise moment when I was most vulnerable, she leapt at the toys I unwittingly offered and snagged them with her needle-like claws. I lost all rational thought to control orderly bodily movements, blindly rising at a violent rate of speed, with the full weight of a kitten hanging from my masculine region. Wild animals are sometimes faced with a 'fight or flight' syndrome. Men, in this predicament, choose only the 'flight' option. I know this from experience. I was fleeing straight up into the air when the sink and cabinet bluntly and forcefully impeded my ascent. The impact knocked me out cold. When I awoke, my wife and the paramedics stood over me. Now there are not many things in this life worse than finding oneself lying on the kitchen floor butt naked in front of a group of 'been-there, done-that' paramedics. Even worse, having been fully briefed by my wife, the paramedics were all snorting loudly as they tried to conduct their work, all the while trying to suppress their hysterical laughter......and not succeeding. Somehow I lived through it all. A few days later I finally made it back in to the office, where colleagues tried to coax an explanation out of me about my head injury. I kept silent, claiming it was too painful to talk about, which it was. 'What's the matter?' They all asked, 'Cat got your tongue?' If they only knew! "
www.dpbolvw.net/email-2740249-10389126
http://www.apsense.com/flash/kelebek1232002 |
No reactions yet.
Please login or sign up to rate this intel.
Please login or sign up to add a comment.
Thanks for the laughs. I haven't had a good laugh like that for a while!
CONTRIBUTOR'S REPLY
Thanks for the comment ! I am so glad you liked it. I figured we can lighten up a bit :)Laughing is good for the soul...
Thank you for sharing this true story, that only goes to show, that truth can be funnier than fiction. We just need to take the time to look at the lighter side.
Best wishes,MASTERTIKITAK.
Frederick
CONTRIBUTOR'S REPLY
Thanks Frederick...Because life is not a bed of roses all the time, I like to read jokes and laugh like crazy, making my kids think, " mom has lost it now for sure ". Ordinarily I let them read what I'm laughing about. This one did not fit that category though  . Thanks again Frederick !
The copyright for this content entitled "CAT LOVERS and KILLER CAT !!!" has been specified by the contributor as:
All Rights Reserved
This content may not be copied, distributed or adapted by anyone under any circumstances.
|
 |
May, 2012
2008
January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December
2009
January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December
2010
January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December
2011
January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December
2012
January, February, March, April, May
|
|
Not a member yet?
Qondio is a powerful network for making it online. If you have a website to
promote, we can help.
Sign up and get in on the action.
|
|
Welcome to Qondio! Discover the awesome power this network can deliver by going to our About page. Or you could skip straight to the Sign Up form.
|
|
